Can you improve relationships in 5 seconds?

by | Feb 18, 2013 | Relationships (Self and Others)

That’s a silly question, isn’t it? As the answer is likely a resounding, “Yes!” We all want to improve our relationships, we just often don’t know how. Sometimes the smallest steps can make the biggest difference, especially if they are taken consistently over a lifetime. So let’s take Key Steps this week and…

Take 5 seconds to make a difference

1. Sharing is indeed caring – especially if it is positive. A recent study in the United States examined day-to-day mood changes associated with disclosure of positive and stressful events as affect regulation within couples. In daily diaries, 48 cohabiting couples reported whether they told their partner about the most positive and stressful event of their day. Participants reported greater positive affect on days when they told their partner about the most positive event of their day. Participants also reported greater positive affect on days when their partner shared their most positive event. Sharing about stressors was not associated with greater negative affect.

2. Create a daily ritual. Share the best event of your day and have your partner share the best event of their day. You might also want to adopt one of my rituals, which is to ask, “What was your lowest low? And what was your highest high?” Asking for the ‘low’ allows the other to offload – and as mentioned above, it is not associated with greater negative affect unless you allow it to degenerate into a daily pity party. Prevent this by remembering to always follow it with the ‘highest high’ of the day. This works well in all relationships – try it with your colleagues, friends and even your kids too. Take 5 seconds today and every day to…

“be the difference that makes the difference




NOTE: The information in my blog may be freely shared and re-used in any online or offline publication, provided it is accompanied by the following credit line: This was written by Dr Sharon King Gabrielides, and originally appeared in her free bi-weekly  ‘Key Steps Food for Thought Blog’ available on the Key Steps website.

Dr Sharon King Gabrielides, EQ Expert, Founder and CEO

Sharon is a dynamic facilitator, speaker and executive coach with over 25 years’ experience in leadership development and organisational transformation. Her PhD thesis contributed a framework for holistic and sustainable leadership development that was published by Rutgers University in the USA. She is faculty of numerous business schools and highly sought-after by leading corporates because she works hand-in-hand with them to create sustainable results and long-term success. In 2020, Sharon was inducted into the Educators Hall of Fame, which is a lifetime achievement award, recognising excellence and her contribution to the field.

Sharon is one of only three women in South Africa to hold the title of Certified Speaking Professional (CSP) – the Oscar of the speaking industry. She is also a COMENSA Master Practitioner (CMP), a qualified Modern Classroom Certified Trainer (MCCT™) and an accredited Global Virtual Speaker. Sharon is also a registered Education, Training and Development Practitioner (ETDP), holds an Honours degree in Psychology and practices as an NLP master practitioner.

Most important to Sharon is that she has become known for her genuinely caring manner, practical and transformational approach, and for providing valuable tools and that allow people to take Key Steps to really… ‘be the difference that makes the difference.’